She Loves Me; She Loves Me Not

I needed some distraction from the doomed PC which I wrote about on an earlier post. So I went surfing on the Net and mentally worked out what steps to take to fix the hub unit and not do violence to the network.

I came upon a love letter of sorts posted on a blog. It read like an impish practical joke. Then it might not. It captured my attention because the blogger really struggled to write this open-letter in English. He acknowledged his English skills were limited. In any case, in tandem below is his original text and my edits.

*****
August 20

Dear wxxx litte sister:
From see you one eye, I love you.

Your eyes close, I die; your eyes open, I come back to live.
Your eyes close and open again and again,I die again and
again.

Maybe you do not remember me, no matter.
When you carefully look at me, you will one see clock.

I think l should introduce myself to you.
I call Lx big great. Toyear 25

My home have four mouth people-papa, mama, I and DD.

I am a good man, in a big company work.

I do early every day, so that I can have strong body to
protect you.

Please come to eat and sleep with me, or I will cut my hair to
be a monk, and find a place where many monks live in to over my life;

Like Your people

*****

I translated your love letter into a more readable and fluent English. I took the liberty of filling in some gaps of your thoughts. Best wishes to you and Miss Wxxx (or Wxxx in Mandarin). The translation is as follows:


Dearest Miss Wxxx:

From the first moment I set eye on you, I am in love.

The magic of your black lashes overpowers me. They flutter swiftly as butterflies and rein in my soul. My life and breath rise and fall to their rhythm.

I am but a face in the masses. Yet, whether we are in a garden or on a crowed avenue, you are the apple of my eye; I want to shield you as my own. If only you see me truly as I am, you would love me as well.

My name is David Lx. I am a healthy 25 year-old male with no vices. I am the older of two brothers. Including our parents, there are four of us in the family. Currently, I hold a very good and secured position with a large corporation.

What I lack is someone to be my wife, friend, and life companion. That someone is you, Miss Wxxx.

You are the apex of my dream and my sweet and precious torment. Only you can unlock my dream. Would you consent to wed me and be my wife? If you should decline, this dream of my will shatter. This life will plunge into the foam of abandonment and water of despair.

The only recourse for suffering this cruelty is for my retreating to a distant and remote buddhist temple. There will I shed my hair and join the brotherhood of monks. The world will hear of David Lx no more.

The One Who Loves and Admires You Always

*****